“You are not your emotions. Your emotions don’t control your life, no matter how fierce, no matter how strong. No matter how relentless. No matter, at times, how overwhelming….
Let the emotions pass through. Feel all you need to feel.
Say all you need to say to let the storm subside.
Then pause. Wait. Rest. Let your body regroup and heal.
You will have grown. You will have changed.
And you’ll be on your way to learning something new.”
~Melody Beattie
I’ve recently gone through a situation in my life where I’ve been let down. Let down by people who I thought were different than they really are. The thing I realized is you can’t be let down if you don’t have expectations. So why do we hold expectations in our minds and hearts when all it does is set us up for disappointment? Isn’t it better to just have no expectations, hope for the best, do our best and realize that some things and people just aren’t as they appear to be? I am the type of person who works from my heart and tries to give people the benefit of the doubt. But, unfortunately not everyone is on that page. We’re all on our own journey and we learn different things at different times. I can respect that.
I typically get along with mostly everybody I cross paths with. I may be drawn to some more than others. I may not agree or vibe as much with certain people. But, for the most part I am open minded enough to respect that we’re all on different paths. Recently, in the workplace I’ve come across people(co-workers) who don’t understand respect, one person in particular, and this was challenging for me because I don’t operate that way in life in general. It brought up a lot of frustration and irritation in me. I realized those were my feelings and thought it better to process them before reacting. (As I’ve learned from Yoga and life) However, the situation continued to escalate with no help or support from the people in charge. Emotions and disrespect got out of hand until the point where I felt I was made out to be a person I am not. I realized it better to remove myself from these energies and focus back on surrounding myself with people I aspire to be like, people who have traits I admire and respect. There was disappointment surrounding this decision because I had given quite a bit to this company. I gave my very valuable time, knowledge, creativity, connections, and energy. And in return, requested nothing but respect and understanding.
I chose to move on but in that decision I found myself angry because what I’d given had been disregarded, I found myself disappointed because the people I thought I was involved with were NOT who I thought they were, I found myself frustrated because I couldn’t get them to have a very basic understanding of mutual respect.
What I learned from this is:
-It’s okay to give but give intelligently. Realize the value of what you have to offer and get compensated for it. Have enough confidence in yourself to value what you are giving.
-Don’t have expectations of people. Realize we’re all just people and no matter how great you may believe someone is, they may have serious faults that you may not want to involve yourself with. Be aware of what and who you are getting involved with.
-Don’t waste your time trying to convince people who you really are. If they don’t see you for who you really are, MOVE ON.
-Be SO clear on who you are & where you stand that when you are made out to be someone you are not it doesn’t affect you.
-When dealing with less aware, self absorbed people it’s okay to draw a line, ESPECIALLY if they are projecting their negativity & insecurity towards you by being disrespectful and domineering. It doesn’t matter if people who are less sensitive to their manipulation agree with you or not. Maybe that is okay for them. But, it doesn’t have to be okay with you.
-It’s okay to have strong emotions toward somebody or something. Don’t judge that….just ride the feelings out until they pass through.
The other thing I realized is, When we feel like the Universe is testing our strength, it’s really just being preparing us for something great. We need strength in order to step into our greatness.
Embrace your challenges!
I read the message above yesterday from my daily inspirations book, “Journey to the Heart” by Melody Beattie. A very special friend of mine gave it to me when I used to work for her. It really helped me to release judgment towards myself for feeling the way I feel. It was a reminder that it really is okay to feel angry, hurt, disappointed, or whatever the feeling may be. I am already aware of this. But, sometimes we just need to be reminded.
ALWAYS STAND STRONG & TALL IN WHO YOU ARE. Always be respectful of others, especially when they have more knowledge and experience in a particular area than you do. Appreciate what they have to share with you.
Don’t give in to something you don’t believe in. If it doesn’t resonate with your soul and what you feel to be right then move on. There are better things in store that will align with you when you become aligned with your truest self.